When I Look Back..
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The days are passing by far too quickly; it is already October. It seems like I just started blogging, yet when I look back at my earlier posts, I realize that it’s been nine months since I first started, and things have changed. It actually feels good writing down all thoughts that run into my mind, I missed writing the past few days.
I haven’t written in the last few days even though I’ve been joyful. I can only write when I’m extremely depressed or experiencing some sort of inner anguish. But today I’m writing to simply thank the universe for the nine months that led to the metamorphosis I’m in right now.
When I first began posting on Medium, I was having a hard time dealing with the breakup and felt as though I had lost everything that was mine. I also couldn’t handle the anguish of losing him. Since then, I have tried many different things, including crying nights, prayer nights, and manifestations. Today, as I reflect on that day, I’m glad I could withstand so much agony while continuing to believe in him.
Complete breakup to emails, emails to SMS, SMS to WhatsApp messages, WhatsApp messages to phone calls, phone calls to video calls. With the aid of manifestations, prayers, and the universe, I was able to restore my relationship to this point. I really thank them all as well as the YouTube videos that helped me keep onto my beliefs and ideas.
Even though my relationship with my father has changed, my mother doesn’t show me the same level of devotion that she does for her other children, and my younger sister utterly disregards me and treats me like a fool, I still feel like running away despite holding on to all of these things.
At this point, I still have optimism that things will improve soon and that God will set everything right when the time is right. Going through this stage of life is extremely terrible. On the one hand, I give thanks to the world for bringing my boyfriend back into my life, while on the other, I beg God to never provide another person with my kind of existence.
